Birds of My Neighborhood Part 1

If you think this post is going to be about birds you couldn’t be more right. However I stole the title of my post from a really wonderful CD by a truly talented band called Innocence Mission. On the Birds of My Neighborhood album can be found one of my favorite songs, Lakes of Canada. No song ever made me feel so much like I was there in a row boat, on a dreary day, on still waters with no one else around, as this song. I love it. (Click the last link to listen.) I digress.

Yesterday when we went downtown we were greeted, near the river, by the largest flock of ducks I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. And I’ve been to a lot of duck ponds.

So without further ado, I give you the birds of my neighborhood.

Duckies, duckies everywhere.

More and more ducks. 124 ducks.

They hired me on the spot to take group portraits. They said it was a family reunion. And I thought human group portrait subjects were hard to coordinate! These people I mean ducks wouldn’t sit still.

This is cousin Elmer.

And this is uncle Ned.

You can see the strong family resemblance. No?

This is Cousin Jerry. He’s a chiropractor. (I won’t tell you what some of his cousins refer to him as. He gets really annoyed when anyone even mentions the Q word.)

Here’s nephew Hank.

And here’s brother John.

Brother John is quite the ladies man. Hank and Ned tried to reason with him, reminding him of the troubles associated with inbreeding but he would not hear it.

You know, there’s nothing like taking a nice big refreshing drink of the same water you poop in.

Awww heck, there’s nothing quite so enjoyable as just diving right into it.

This little nameless somebody finally found a moment of peace and quiet. Not so easy to do in a flock this size.

But some manage to slip away.

Ahhh, a happy little gathering on the path. Isn’t that just the most serene thing you’ve ever seen?

Don’t mind us. We’re just minding our own business, sunning ourselves and whatnot.

But what is this?! Cousin Zeke has a bad feeling. He always did have a sixth sense about him. He just knows when bad things are about to happen.

This just solidifies for everyone that Zeke really missed his calling as a webbed foot reader, choosing instead to make his living as a web designer.

The doubters are now believers.

As I was doing my best to finish the photo shoot for this feather-brained family, I happened upon an awkward fellow who Hank informed me was known as Cousin Boris. He was taken under Pa Ducken’s wing because no one really had the heart to tell him that he wasn’t a duck after all. He was just a goose who was LEFT BEHIND after the trumpets honked at the Goose Rapture. Nobody wants to make him feel bad so no one has told him that he’s not really a duck. (Shhhhhh….)

Don’t point it out to him, if you happen to meet him. He’s very sensitive about not fitting in.

Even though Pa Ducken keeps telling him that he’s just extra special, he thinks he knows the real truth; namely that he’s a freak of nature.

And if he even thinks your about to tease him he makes known his displeasure.

If he were really a duck he wouldn’t be so sensitive. He would just let those insults roll off him like…. well you know.