When toddlers read the news….

Look at this face. Does this look like the face of a person who is thinking about the state of the global economy?

Does this?

Maybe not. But he really is. He is wondering if Pampers stocks are going to plummet because of the recession. He is worried about his 401K. He is actually not sucking his thumb. He has just bitten off all his nails and is now working on his digits.

He examines the paper.

It doesn’t look good folks. It doesn’t look pretty.

He’s afraid that the ceaseless war in Iraq is going to adversely effect the price of vitamin C (I don’t know why he’s linked this to the war in Iraq but he figures most problems harken back to the war in Iraq so it’s a pretty good bet. He’s actually willing to run for president on that platform.) He’s read that it’s gone up to $4,000,000 a barrel. The implications of this could be dastardly. He’s picturing his life as a victim of scurvy. He’s wondering how greatly this will affect his long term dental health and if he will be able to effectively fight off the ever more virulent viruses and superbugs.

Oh no. This really is worse than he thought.

He starts feverishly biting at his remaining digits again.

Oh, dear. Oh, d-d-dear.

Ah, but here we see that the young economist is not all gloom and doom….

“Take heart, my people. I am an optimist.”

“Everything is gonna work out! (When I become president that is.) In the mean time, I say, put it all in diapers and various ointments. That’s where the money will be folks. That is where you are going to get the most bang for your buck. I just have a feeling.”