Ha ha. Just kidding. This isn’t a political post. (Well… it isn’t meant to be anyways.)

I read somewhere that boys needed to have play guns and that if they don’t have play guns they will turn just about anything into a play gun. I can’t remember which book it was but we’ll just blame it on this one for the sake of time since it seems a safe bet…


I can attest to the truth of this because other than a couple of super cheap cap guns that the kids had several years ago, they have never had many toy guns. But lo, as foretold, they have turned everything into guns, be they sticks, be they legos, be they crackers with a corner bitten off, be they tacos, be they mashed potatoes. (Okay, so I haven’t really witnessed that… but I wouldn’t put it past ’em!) And anything they have not turned into guns, they have turned into swords or light sabres (depending on whether they were being knights or Jedis.)

Tonight while cruising the mall because we wanted to escape the house and there seemed to be nothing else to do (Have I mentioned that it’s cold where we live? Probably not. Actually… it was quite warm today by our standards but still cold enough to snow.) suddenly I decided that the boys needed toy guns. Nerf guns (or whatever brand exists now that is equivalent to what we knew as Nerf.)

I have a confession to make. I didn’t just get them guns because that book up there (may have) told us to get them guns. I did it because I really like Nerf guns. They are just fun to play with.

Our children, having never had us buy them anything at the toy store while just moseying through as we do now and then, thought they had died and gone to heaven when we suddenly decided to purchase toys for them with no birthdays even cresting the horizon. The looks on their faces were almost better than Christmas because on Christmas they expect to get stuff.

So when we got home, the fun began. And here is how it went down.

The fierce hunter waits for just the right moment to shoot his unsuspecting prey…


Clearly, he gets a great deal of pleasure out of shooting this poor helpless ducky.


Soon the fierce hunter has a daring little helper by his side …





Not so much

Well, that was fun.

But hunting a flightless stuffed ducky can get rather boring. So a change was called for. It was time for a stick up.

The young bandit takes the old girl in his hands and declares,

Whoo Doggy

But then in a bizarre twist of fate, he hands Mommy the gun and orders,

Stick Up1


I suwwenew

Uh. Oh.

Im Dead

Just as an aside (be warned, my asides have been known to grow to Neanderthal proportions) have I ever mentioned how much of a BOY my fourth boy is? When he first took this new gun in his hands he stood in a stance reminiscent of Rambo, legs at a sturdy shoulder width apart, his gun clasped in both hands diagonally across his chest, a snarl on his lips. And when he holds a gun or a sword or the Wii nun-chucks for boxing he speaks the toughest words he can think of in his manliest gruffest voice. He also frequently does daring (read: stupid) stunts and then shouts, “Mommy, check it!” Oh the ER visits that await us with this one….

Back to the show…

But does the little victim of the stick-up go down that easy? Not on your life.


He falls in a very dramatic way.

Stickup part 2

And then he rolls over and just for effect and to make sure that I know he’s really dead he reiterates…


And then we tucked them all in bed.

The end.

19 thoughts on “Gun Control Issues

  1. what is it with guns on boys? I started out with my first boy, positive in my self righteousness that I’d never buy a toy gun. Yeah, well, EVERYTHING became a gun. Legos, sticks..well, not mashed potoatoes *g. Anyway, I have to admit, the lego guns are fun! Oh, or the ones that shot ping pong balls!

    kacey’s last blog post..Life in Focus-Reflections

  2. hahaha, I have am not big on toy guns and my reason being is we are avid hunters and I strongly tell my sun guns are for hunting only. But we do have a few her in my house as long as they are not pointed at people all is good. My favorite is the Blow dart gun we use the stunners for it very entertaining. Have fun with your Jr. hunters.

    Sarah Rogstad’s last blog post..SORROW

  3. I love reading your posts about your boys because it is obvious that you adore them and truly enjoy being their mom.

    As a teacher, I have heard parents say horrible things to and about their children. It has made me more keenly aware of the times I see parents loving and respecting their kiddos in the grocery store, at the park, in a parent conference, on a blog.

    Thank you for giving me joy because you enjoy your kiddos.

    Kim’s last blog post..Here’s My Guy!

  4. Ah, boys and their toys. But how cute yours are! (As my aside, Bruce is a beautiful dog – and the duck just adds to his charm.) I don’t have kids, so I haven’t read that book, but I’ve heard good things about it.

    Jean’s last blog post..Straight Outta Podunk

  5. This was fun to read! My neighbor has a child the same age as my son. She does not allow him to have toy guns, so whenever he visits us, he can’t wait to play with our cap guns.

    Looks like you had a lot of fun!

    leah belle’s last blog post..I Joined A Coop!

  6. Bruce is a sweety! He loves that duck… and the stuffed bunny (known as “Bun Bun”)… he is always trying to sneak off with them! He doesn’t destroy them either. He just lays them next to him! LOL

  7. Nerf guns rock. My son, husband and my brother race around the house like idiots. The Nerf guns are even more popular then the marshmellow gun from two years ago.

  8. This is positively a perfectly executed hilarious post about boys and their toys. Every word of it could have been written about my three boys. My eldest (so, y’know, the one who was never exposed to computer games or “violent” cartoons, or StarWars or even the nightly news) chewed his toast into a “shooter thing” (he didn’t even know the proper terminology!!!) when he was three. We never did figure out where he learned about guns.

    Btw, I sent a little blog love your way in my post yesterday…
    Blessings, Susan

    susan (in socal)’s last blog post..Ready. Set. Swing.

  9. Too funny! I too have a boy and yep everything he can get his hands on becomes a gun, sword or light saber. Seems our house is pretty much a 24 hour a day fight scene with dramatic death scenes or shouts of victory. My daughter has even gotten in on it, but only when playing with her big brother. It’s just a guy thing…LOL

  10. Too true, too true. My kids don’t know the right terminology either, “I gunned you!” or, “Gun! Gun!” I don’t know where they got it either. We bought them hockey sticks (now isn’t that boyish enough???) and cut off the top down to their size, well, the top that we cut off is now a sword! And we only have one boy! And one, very girly, very feminine, plays house and mommy with the swords and guns, girl.

    Helen’s last blog post..Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny…

  11. Helen, our boys do exactly the same thing with their hockey sticks! One way it’s a gun, the other way it’s a sword and the *other* way it’s really a hockey stick! LOL :^D

  12. Pingback: Mr. Dramatic «
  13. I believe I read a very good explanation of this in Eldredge’s “Wild At Heart.” I completely agree that there is something about guns that makes little boys VERY happy. I will say that I have worked hard to have our boys go hunting for animals and NOT shoot one another… doesn’t always work, but there you go. What does in parenting?

What are your thoughts?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s