Spores of Eternity

What shall I cry out? All flesh is like grass. All the prophets are poets all the poets, prophets Seeing how the words add up to not enough Yet, we must stab out towards the Greatness the Infinity that calls unto our Deep Condemning our shallows Yet in the chasm between we find small tastes of Freedom of the […]

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A Winter Prayer

A Winter Prayer Good Maker, I stare at my bare branches and feel naked AshamedDid I not sign up to be Always Spring, Always Green?As I look down I can’t even see my roots All I see is leaf litter, the waste product of my past beauty – which may never come again. But as I think […]

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Sunsets

Somewhere right now it’s sunset, the blazing end of day. The sky is somewhere purple orange and bluish red and gray. Perhaps their only onlookers are dolphins as they play, but the earth and sun their courses run, never stopping this display. And it happens every moment as night falls in planetary ballet, morning breaks […]

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Wall Friends

Friendship used to be gabbing and laughter and knowledge. It was deep conversations about struggles and joys. A morning walk or a coffee together. It was a daily or weekly phone call. A familiar voice. A trip to the mall. It was tight hugs with weary arms and wet tears on shoulders. Now friendship is […]

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Trembling Gates

“Beloved, if it had been possible to destroy the church of God on earth, it would have been destroyed long ago.” -Spurgeon And the gates of hell quiver at her love and submission to His call. For they know she will prevail because every footstep in her humble sojourn on this ball through stormy gale […]

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Identity

Do my roles in life and their natural progression of changes define me? No. Do my circumstances and crises fundamentally alter my identity? No, they display what or who holds me together and pulls me apart. They merely reveal and pull back the veil exposing to light who I am at my core. Nothing less. […]

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Our March

For Kara. Oh death, how much we loathe you. How we rue the day you entered the world and with that bite that began with a flicker of a doubt that God was good we all were hurled into this breaking, into this aching, into the dark hands of the shadowlands. Oh death, enemy of […]

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Nothing to Say

Nothing to say Even though you’re here; Not an airwave Or a wire Or even a pen Or a word as it were. But a greyness descended. Our voices have ended. The music, it echoes Of laughter’s delight But the casket is closing To the silence of Earth’s long night. Your shadow grows long As […]

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Good stuff and Giveaways

I used Grammarly to grammar check this post because I am suffering from Summer-induced Grammnesia. It’s a serious ailment, common to homeschool moms (and maybe any teacher), wherein your ability to find and detect grammatical errors has been temporarily debilitated due to the summer heat and sudden onset of freedom. Speaking of homeschooling, we are […]

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Webs

I’m not a huge fan of spiders. I mean… I am. I like them because they are good for the garden, eating all of those pesky bugs that we like even less than spiders. Sometimes I even like to look at them. So what I’m saying is that I love spiders. Unless one happens to […]

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Din

This place is like a hollow gourd with a seed in it. tink-tink Noise. Reckless, pointless noise and chatter. Everyone come and gather so we can Blather blather blather. It’s like an empty cup of tin. Rattle, clatter, din. So loud with empty you can hardly hear a thing. It’s roaring with a vortex full […]

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Walk with me

(For my friends who grieve.) Walk with me or I walk alone. I cannot talk; There are no words. Nothing helps or heals this broken open gaping wide jagged edges bleeding on the inside. I’m like a vapor. Barely here and still I Walk walk walk. Walk with me as my covering in the black […]

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Engagement Photography

Last weekend I had the opportunity to photograph a lovely couple. I brought my sweet hubby along as my assistant and second shooter. I also like to call him my beast of burden because photography equipment is heavy! We had a great time and really captured the joy and love between these two. The weather […]

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Tonsil Boy

Over the past few months I’ve taken to calling my oldest son, “Tonsil Boy.” He has had Strep Throat 5 times in a row… I think it’s 5 anyway. A lot. I’ve lost count. No sooner would he finish a round of antibiotics before coming down with it again. Essentially someone in our house has […]

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A little bit closer

I live in a neighborhood that would likely be passed over quickly by those who don’t know it. In fact, truth be told, there’s a chance they might even drive a little faster. I gotta keep it real, people. It’s no The Hamptons. No offense to any The Hamptons dwellers intended of course. I’m pretty […]

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Cluttered

Cluttered. desk, floor, brain jumbled fumbling numbly bumbling wondering and wishing and thinking maybe something needs to change. Here before me calendars, dead batteries words in jaunty child-penned form scattered like the laundry in a pile over there. nerves, thoughts, heart uncentered fuzzy hazy fog seeking saviors everywhere. I am a soul-reflecting thought collecting guilt […]

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Blissdom Beginnings…

First, I’m going to break one of the rules I remember from a particularly helpful workshop at Blissdom (taught by Tsh Oxenrider) by writing several multi-sentence paragraphs in a row, unbroken by any pictures (okay, maybe I’ll add some pictures in between paragraphs after all.) I reserve the right to break the rules! (I feel […]

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Everything.

I love everything about this picture. It was my Mom’s SOMETHINGth birthday. (She doesn’t believe the number and neither do I so why mention it?) And we sort of surprised her by showing up at lunchtime and then staying all day and then making fajitas for dinner and then making a 4 layer vanilla cake […]

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Catch my breath

Do you mind if I catch my breath and try just to quantify all that’s going on? ‘Cause I’m lost and found and this train is bound for a land beyond by and by. But I can’t tell where I am and I can’t say why I know I’m fine. I just know I am. […]

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Just a peek…

I barely have enough brain cells to scrape together right now to create a post at all, let alone a coherent one. Soon I will be able to post a little bit more about my Blissdom experience. Basically, I was really, really busy and had a wonderful time, met some wonderful people (some that I […]

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I dropped it.

My camera. You know, the irony is that I always tell the kids to be careful with “the baby” when I actually venture to let them take a picture. I want them to learn to use a camera and to play with light and try to shoot pictures from different angles. I want them to […]

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Rain

sweet rain. how i love the sound of you playing on the window pane dancing on the rooftops and sliding down the drain running down the sidewalk childlike and free barefoot, naked, arms outstretched like an old oak tree You smell like air and dirt and oil and grease and burgers, shakes and fries all […]

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Self-Challenges

I have mentioned it a few times but I probably need to mention it again because if I don’t mention it now then nothing happens and I go on with life as usual and that’s very sad. So I should mention it now. And I think I will. Yes, I am! Have I mentioned how […]

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Dress Up

Yesterday I had an impromptu, totally unplanned and completely spontaneous (gosh, I love being redundant. Redundancy is the best!) photo shoot with my nieces. The idea popped into my head when I went into my Mom’s house to chat with her. I saw my sister’s wedding dress lying out on a chair (major cleaning happening), […]

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Joys and Sorrows

Joys and sorrows crows and sparrows droughts and downpours hearts and arrows Is life ever and forever all a mix of pain and pleasure Blood and water ice and fire grace and graveyards doom and shire hopes and fears crowns and crosses cribs and caskets gains and losses Will the always be a never this […]

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Christ Entered In

Oh, there is a day, and it hurts like hell, when it seems like the sun has gone away, soul sorrow so deep that no mouth can tell, but Jesus has felt it on the world’s darkest day. Sleep will not come and tears will not end, the sorrow so great it’s just under your […]

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Some of my favorite pictures from 2012

Because my blog is just coming back to life after being tended to on such an irregular basis for the past little while, I haven’t been posting very many pictures. Part of the reason is that outside of shooting weddings, I’ve actually not been taking quite the volume of “everyday” pictures that I have in […]

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My dream?

Okay, so one dream is already going to happen. I am going to Blissdom and I’m so excited. Yes, I’m excited because I get to, for the first time (ever? really? ever?) yes… ever, go away by myself and be part of something so awesome that I know some of my bloggy friends have so […]

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Hiraeth

They say home is where you hang your hat but an internal finger scratches my head at that. My hats have been hung and strewn all about, certainly enough places to raise a small doubt, as I uproot and then land and then once again roam I’ve yet to find one place that just shouts, […]

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Nieces

I, as you know, am a mom of four boys.  Four boys who, tonight in particular, can sometimes drive me mad with their incessant boyish craziness.  Love them and all but sometimes I seriously just feel a wee tad alone (no offense, Cupcake, but you don’t much count for making me feel a lot of […]

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Cool Hair, School Hair

I’m feeling Dr. Seussy today and have written a little poem in honor of those children who have lost their hair because of chemotherapy. Cool hair, school hair, crazy whacked out fool hair. Fun hair, bun hair, been out in the sun hair. Fuzzy hair, buzzy hair, I don’t even care hair. Curly hair, swirly […]

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Grey

Sometimes the world seems ashen grey like a murky pool or dried up branch of melancholy hue, perhaps a blasé piece of dried up clay left out too long one Summer day. No smile soft or sanguine thought can grant retreat away from this achromatic concrete day. Sometimes the world seems black and white. This […]

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Beautiful

God is teaching me so much about His grace and infinite mercy and kindness lately.  Circumstances are not ideal and they rarely are for our own liking.  As humans we always can think of something, diminutive or grandiose, worth tweaking that would presumably make circumstances just *that* much more pleasant for us, one way or […]

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Father's Day

I know I’ve been AWOL forever and ever. Life has been very busy. I am not really up to blogging about it all yet but I needed to post my Father’s Day video that I shot with the iPad 2 that I actually, yes, WON thanks to ebookfling.com

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Hello. I'm alive! (Barely)

Seriously, this move did. me. in. (Never-mind that it was one of the shortest distance moves I’ve ever made.) Not only was I emotionally toast (so much going into that, I can’t even touch on all of it), I was very nearly physically done in as well. I was sore and exhausted, having done not […]

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Good Good Good Good Friday

Good good good good Friday. He bowed his head and cried as He was crucified that God would lift my head and raise me from the dead. Good good good good Friday. Good good good good Friday. He suffered on that cross. It looked like love had lost that I might see His face and […]

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Just Some Spring

It’s been raining for weeks and weeks here. Reminds me of my one year of living in the Pacific Northwest (well, I suppose where I was it was considered Southwest because it was in Canada). The good thing about all the rain is knowing that it will make everything lush and verdant when the sun […]

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Just pictures

My kids are loving their art class this year. They have made some truly beautiful creations and they all want to do art again next year. Unfortunately I only got pictures of three of them with their latest creations. My favorite might just be that sinister psycho bunny head floating menacingly over the mysterious sailboat. […]

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Salvation…

Mercy supplied was justice applied to Jesus who died, when death He defied that grace might betide His sin-soiled Bride that she might abide, eschewing her pride, in the love He provides, that over all He’d preside In His Kingdom worldwide.

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Gentle Shepherd

Gentle Shepherd, fierce protector bind my wounds, my soul inspector. Table turner, Humble servant break my heart, and crush the serpent. Sea Commander, water walker calm my spirit as I falter. Gracious Savior, sin’s contender grant my heart a calm surrender. King anointed, older brother let me never serve another. World creator, people buyer, wash […]

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Word Clouds

Words are like clouds that float out of reach, hovering vapors, looking solid to touch, they come in as thoughts that drift into speech, like sprinkles or showers, too little or much. Some words like cirrus are high wisps of cloud if the pressure agrees and conditions are nice, but many will make their way […]

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Little Bits of I-Love-You

Stuck-on sparkles, old elastic metal clips and see-through plastic, Bits of paper, string and glue, little flecks of I-love-you. A stick with arms, some legs, a head, some frizzled hair (just bits of thread) “It’s you!” a finger points in ballyhoo to little marks of I-love-you. Some hearts float ’round about the air A rainbow […]

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Imago Dei Coram Deo

You fashioned us in Imago Dei, soft moons to the sun’s bright glorious ray. We see through a glass though dimly light, a pallid opaque between morning and night. We are but mirrors all broken and cracked, your light, we, in imperfect prisms refract. Coram Deo, we live under your gaze, though your face yet […]

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My Old Friend

Today, my mom and my husband and I all worked to remove the enormous root of an old Oak Tree in which I spent much of my childhood.  It died long ago due to a disease and had to be cut down.  I still remember the sadness in my heart when my Mom called and […]

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A Day

This was a day.  I realize how banal of a post title that is.  But the day was not banal.  Of course, it could have been far less banal, (I’m sorry, are you getting tired of the word banal? Banal banal banal banal banal) that is, it could have been even more eventful than it […]

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Life Together

There is a longing that runs terribly deep. Like a rivulet running down a mountain steep wants to reach the sea’s encompassing embrace so the transformed heart longs for human grace; Grace divinely given but humanly applied, His Kingdom come in coming alongside. Life together, communion’s design, a body united as grapes on the vine, […]

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A Labor of Love

Tonight during our advent reading we read about Mary. The reading pointed out that she was really the very first Christian. Kiss the Son She was the first one that believed, the first to call Him Savior, her savior Jesus, she received, was Emmanuel inside her. The Holy Spirit wrought in Mary salvation’s only hope […]

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Barren One, Rejoice!

You were cast off and deserted like a wife, in your spirit you were grieved for the innocence of youth you lost. Your spirit was ravaged and bereaved. You were afraid and shaken like a widow, confounded at your sure disgrace. But you shall not feel your loss forever, the memory of reproach shall be […]

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The True Son

Jesus, the true Adam Jesus, the true Joshua Jesus, the true Moses Jesus, the true Israel Jesus, our Immanuel Israel once fled to Egypt’s gleams during famine in their own lands. God ordained it through Joseph’s dreams and Israel’s sons’ corrupted hands. Jesus was ushered to Egypt too. Corruption of Israel’s “sons,” it  would seem, […]

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The Conquering King

Oh Christian, take heart, no need for despair for hope is the thing that is filling the air! No fear for tomorrow or what is to come for Christ is the King and earth his Kingdom! At Christmas we hear the songs of the king the babe in the manger who changed everything. We hear […]

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Repentance

How can I answer the Lord of Hosts? Behold, I am of lowly account. I can do nothing but cover my mouth. Before God to what do I amount? I’ve spoken once, which was one too much I will not attempt to answer the Lord. Should I proceed and answer twice, the aftermath I could […]

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When God Answers

A whirlwind thundered and God spoke aloud demanding, “Who dares question God? You speak as if you know my ways, as if you hold my measuring rod! Tell, me if you understand it all! Where were you when I laid out the earth, when the sea was established in form? Where were you on the […]

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My Redeemer

Who is righteous before our God? Who can contend with his might? One could give a thousand answers, but not a one would be right. Wise in heart and mighty in strength, He seals up the stars and rules the sun. In his anger the mountains he uproots, for who can ask, “God, what have […]

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The King

Hallelujah! Salvation and glory belong to Him Each one of His judgments is true and just. For He has crushed underfoot the whoring one who corrupted the earth with her craven lust. For all of the righteous who e’er have been slain He’s avenged upon her that blemished His name. The blood of His prophets […]

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Joyce

Dear Joyce Our dear sister Joyce, with you we rejoice For he’s taken you home and restored your praising voice. Jesus is yours and not a sigh nor a tear, though we know if you’d had your way, you’d have gone home last year! No more pain in your steps as your earthly life you […]

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The Word

In the beginning was the Word, the Word by which the world was given birth, the only Word that holds all things together and brought salvation to the earth. This Word is with and is our God, that Word which is the light of all mankind. This Word which is a lamp unto our footsteps, […]

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America's Eden

Long ago and far away were heavy hearts struck deep with hope, with longing stare unto the distant “over there,” with a sigh, a tear. It seemed like dreaming, to some a joke, this hope they held so tight Whispers of peace and land and liberty fell on every listening ear. Farther still in other […]

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The Vine

I have learned a new song this past week and I am rather ODing on it at this point.  I really like ODing on songs of praise to our God.  I don’t think I can quite do it often enough.  Something tells me I won’t get bored at all with all the constant praise going […]

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Halloween in a NUTshell

Emphasis on NUT.  Cause my kids are nuts.  But their my nuts.  And I love ’em. This is a soldier.  Private Ryan?  I don’t know really.  Someone brave and rugged though.  And looking shell-shocked. My Motley Crew This is what happened when I said, “Get in character!!” This is Igor. This is my little Rescue […]

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My pregnant friend…

I got to take some pictures of my pregnant friend the other day.  I love this friend.  She is such a sweet and genuine person.  I’ve known her for less than a year but it feels like longer. Also, another noteworthy thing — we have been going outside.  Every day.  I can’t express how lovely […]

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A sleepy afternoon…

I had a terrible night’s sleep last night and I woke up feeling icky.  It was snowing again when we woke up this morning.  My littlest guy also wasn’t feeling very well.  This combination meant that I stayed home from church with my two younger kids.  It was a sleepy morning. And a sleepy afternoon.  […]

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Effects…

I love how different effects can totally change the feel of a picture… I love how this one turned out in black and white… His eyes are delightful. But I also like how vibrant it is in color… Photoshop is magic people.  Magic. I love this one in the faded seventies look… Which of these […]

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More from Farmer's Market

So many colors at the Farmer’s Market.  Oh, by the way, you probably already guessed that not everything that is sold at our Farmer’s Market is grown locally.  I mean, we have coconuts there…. and avocados.  To be honest I’m not really sure that any of it is more local than what we might get […]

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Li'l Rascals

You know, there is nothing like exposing your kids to all of the right t.v. and movie characters throughout the generations. You know, like Wallace and Beaver Cleaver, Gilligan and the gang, The Brady fam, The Jetsons and their Hanna-Barbara ilk.  Nothing will give kids a strong sense of television and movie history and a […]

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Travels

Our family drives a lot.  There are many reasons for this.  The most obvious reason is that we live far from family.  For many that means lots of flying, for some it simply means never seeing family, for us it means lots of driving.  It means lots of driving because flying is very expensive for […]

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We are home…

We are home and so happy to not be on the road anymore!  And what a warm welcome we received.  When we walked in the door of our house we discovered that our church family had  cleaned our whole house, including the garage which has recently (during our basement renovation project) been nicknamed, “One step […]

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Designer Dog Breeds…

Designer dog breeds are of course all the rage.  I mean, who hasn’t heard of the Puggle or the Yorkipoo, the Goldendoodle or the Labradoodle?  Chances are, your neighbour has one.  Our neighbour has one.  She’s a Goldendoodle with the sweetest personality.  She’s adorable.  We ourselves for a short while had a small dog that […]

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Goggles

Last year we bought the kids some goggles for their swimming lessons.  My two little ones love wearing their goggles even when they’re not swimming.  I just can’t help but laugh… especially at my three year old… who also dresses himself.  His ensembles plus the goggles are enough to make any eyes bug out. And […]

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Busyness and Babies

We’ve been über busy as you may have guessed.  Wonderfully, pleasantly busy.  I could say a hundred million things, all good, about our time with our dear friends but I think I’ll just leave it at, “It was wonderful.”  The weather was positively Summer-like when they were here.  And it has been positively brisky since […]

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Friends and Photos

New friends are wonderful. Aren’t they? The only one missing from this photo is my baby who was home with Daddy, taking a nap. And these new friends are no exception.  Only thing is… they don’t seem like new friends… they seem like old friends.  They are already dear friends, that I know.  They are […]

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Fall Portraits

I love taking fall portraits of my boys.  The intense colors of the season just call my camera’s name. “Hello….” They call.  They sing to me.  They beckon like as unto the Hills calling Fraulein Maria. And Fraulein Maria and I just can’t say no to the talking trees and leaves and the laughing breezes.  […]

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What are Grandpas good for?

Grandpas are the best, are they not?  Grandpa and Uncle Phil have been here for 10 days helping us and spending time with us and we have had a wonderful time together.  Grandpa has installed numerous pipes, faucets, sinks and a garbage disposal (he’s going to get a special place in heaven for that good […]

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Where?

Where does the time go?  How is it that this child is almost three years old? When did that happen? I thought I just had him? I thought he was just nursing and sleeping next to me in my bed. I thought I was just bringing him home from the hospital when he was ten […]

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Fiasco Gelato

Last night I did something very uncharacteristic for me.  I went downtown with a girlfriend.  Just.  For.  Fun.  She went to Greece earlier this year and came back telling me all about her awesome travels.  She told me how she fell in love with Gelato and ate it just about every day when she was […]

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A Perfect Day…

Yesterday was such a perfect day. The weather was beautiful and the mountains were calling our names.  (Can you tell that I have a Fraulein Maria complex?  The hills are alive.  For real man.) In the morning we woke up and felt the definite need for donuts. This is a need that must not be […]

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Only in Photoshop

Only in Photoshop can you go from this: to this: (Editing to add) Or from this: to this: Yeah.  That’s my definition of fun. The quality of these pictures isn’t so great because they were just taken in Photobooth on my computer but it’s still fun to play with them.

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The Boxer

My littlest man loves boxing.  It’s his favorite game to play on the Wii and it’s one of his favorite things to do with his Daddy lately.  (His other favorite is cuddling.)  Call me selfish but I really don’t want my kids being in any sport that has a likely potential to cause facial disfigurement […]

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The Man Can Hula

So you know that a while back I decided that dadgummit (who made up that ridiculous word anyways?  It’s not something I ever say in real life but, dadgummit, I can’t help typing it for some reason), anyways, where was I?  Oh, right, DADGUMMIT I needed to do something about my arm loaves.  Well, I’m […]

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Other People's Flowers

I like other people’s flowers the best because they are free, for one thing. But I like them also because I get to keep them even after they die.  I mean, I get to keep my own flowers  after they die too but it seems more fun to get something out of other people’s effort […]

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Birds

Yes, I’m still getting mileage off of our trip to the zoo.  This has been a super busy week that has involved a lot more than just a trip to the zoo… Some of it has involved these yummy little darlings… A friend of mine and I both worked on these on Wednesday night for […]

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Baby Birds

Today was apparently nest leaving day somewhere in the vicinity of our backyard for a family of Chipping Sparrows.  Initially I found a shivering baby bird and my motherly instinct took over before I Googled what to do for a baby bird.  I really just didn’t want the poor thing to be eaten by our […]

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I love this girl…

This girl is my soul sister.  Not only is she my soul sister but she is beautiful.  (And sassy.) This weekend we were blessed enough to enjoy a much awaited visit from some very dear friends of ours whom we met 9 years ago when we moved to a little place known as “Aggieland”, Texas.  […]

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